Bit of an identity crisis this week… At the weekend i thought i was turning Japanese – more of that some other time though – and, yesterday, i went all Tarantino!
i blame Slate McCleod – he’s the one who put the idea into my head of getting all the usual suspects together, all dressed in black suits, to do something along the lines of Reservoir Dogs. Great idea, except i’ve never seen the film… i did toy with the idea of a hybrid of Reservoir Dogs and A Clockwork Orange, (Clockwork Dogs?, or maybe Reservoir Droogs?), but in the end thought better of it. Nevertheless, the thought must have still been bouncing around my head because yesterday when i logged in, i had this overwhelming desire to do something Tarantino-esque. Well, Kill Bill happens to be one of my favourite films and, given that sl gives you free licence to do whatever you fancy… Well, where else do you honestly get to don yellow leathers, ride fast bikes and kill people indiscriminately?
Yes folks… Here comes The Bride!
i grant you, my bike wasn’t quite as eye-catching, or as fast – probably a very good thing – as the one from the film, but it had cool sound effects, proper smoke from the exhaust and, what’s more, i could reach the handlebars – a fairly unusual occurrence in sl. Despite its dubious heritage, it did catch some admiring glances from at least one bike/scooter aficionado, so it must have looked ok.
So there i am, clad in yellow leather, perched on my pillion and out for revenge, (whaddya mean, you haven’t seen the film? Watch it… Right now!), it stands to reason that the obligatory burning off down the road, preferably pitted against a fast car, should be the order of the day. Sadly, sl was playing up monstrously with more lag than an immersion heater prepared for a winter in the Antarctic – it was hard enough just to get down the road in one piece and, unfortunately, my only real challenger ended up wedging her car, on its side, on the pavement between a lamppost and the wall of Subculture – honestly, where do these people learn to drive? It was hardly Kill Bill, more like Die Laughing!
No complaints from me though – it was all really good fun and although i didn’t get a chance for a big showdown at the pub, chopping off people’s arms and similar exploits, the only real reason is that nobody dared try to attack me!
In fact, it was so much fun, it won’t take much for me to don the yellow leathers and take to the road again! Coming to think of it, that gives me an idea… there must be loads of classic movie pastiches just begging to be re-created in sl… all it takes is a spot of inventiveness and just a little helping of crazy! If anyone has a particular favourite, let me know, and if i like it, i might just take the bait, (“you’re going to need a bigger boat!” 😉 ) – who knows, if i like it enough, i might just make a film of it too!
Those of you lucky enough to still have your lives, take them with you! But leave the limbs you have lost. They belong to me now.
The Bride (Kill Bill)