Ever had that sudden realisation that you’re completely out of your depth? It’s not a feeling that i’m particularly familiar with – wherever possible, i try to avoid situations that are going to drop me in at the deep end, and even if i do find myself in that unfortunate position, i can generally bluff my way through and rise to whatever challenge is thrown in my path. Even so, i’m only human, (some of you may have your doubts!), and there will be times when – whether justifiably or not – i am going to find myself faced with something that is going to put my nerve properly to the test. And it always happens when you don’t expect it.
Over the past few weeks, the more observant among you may have picked up on the fact that i’ve upped the stakes a little for the sl birthday celebration. Last year’s event was the first that i was really aware of the whole thing and, somewhat to my surprise, i thoroughly enjoyed getting stuck into it both through my own modest contribution, helped by your good selves, and also the time i spent exploring the celebration sims – it was a thoroughly enjoyable time for me and this year i was determined to make the most of it again. i can’t explain the madness that gripped me and prompted me into applying for a plot this year – to be completely honest, i even held back on the build, thinking that my chances of success were slim – that was a mistake! Not only do i have a plot, but i happen to think it’s one of the best ones on the whole site – a corner plot, mere metres from the main stage and overlooking the water sims – it’s fab! When i first saw it on Sunday, i was blown away.
And that’s when it all started to sink in.
You tend to forget how big an event the birthday celebration is, both in scale and scope – when i arrived there were very few builds in place, and those that were there looked pretty professional – what on earth was i thinking of? Did i really think that i was worthy of dumping my cobbled-together load of prims in the midst of all this creativity and effort? Suddenly, i felt quiet horribly out of my depth, but it was too late to turn back now.
i’ve always been a firm believer in getting on with the job, no matter how daunting – after all, every journey – no matter how far – begins with a single step, so it was very much a case of cracking on and catching up with all that work that i’d been holding back on… and there’s still quite a way to go, but it will be ready in time! In fact, it struck me that if i could get everything to a point where i could actually get the build on site, with at least the appearance of progressing nicely, then that would spur me on far more than any other encouragement. So that’s what i did, and today, my build is standing proudly in it’s intended space, and you know what?… i’m pretty damn pleased with it!
Some things can be pretty daunting, i guess – and when we’re acutely aware of our own limitations, particularly in comparison with the skills and abilities of others, they can be all the more terrifying, but if it weren’t for life’s, (and SLife’s), challenges and testing, how would we ever learn what we are capable of achieving? Last year, completely to my surprise, my SL9B Time Capsule was chosen as the winning entry – i didn’t think i stood a chance, but i guess it couldn’t have been all that bad, after all… so just maybe my apprehension this year is a little misguided.
And what is life if we’re not prepared to take the occasional risk?
However, all this effort is taking its toll… hopefully it’ll all be finished very soon, until then my apologies to those of you who might have thought i’ve disappeared off the face of the SLearth recently; my apologies that my emails are languishing unanswered, and; my apologies to those of you who are also participating in the celebrations and whom i should be supporting with stories, pictures and all that other stuff – i promise i will get round to it, soon!
What fun, eh?
To dream the impossible dream
To fight the unbeatable foe
To bear with unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go
Carter USM – The Impossible Dream