He’s Mr Bling, with his flashy ring
And his scripts set oh so high
He’s such a drag, as he causes lag
Whenever he passes by
With his manly chest and wifebeater vest
He thinks he’s mega cool
But the girls don’t care for his system hair
And they think he’s just a fool.
It’s no surprise he has outsize thighs
And a six pack sculpted on
But at nine feet tall, his look overall
Is just completely wrong.
His way with words, to impress the birds
Isn’t quite as suave as he thinks
They share his IMs with all their friends
And giggle into their drinks.
And you should see, when he is free
To strut his stuff on the floor
His chim is naff, so it makes you laugh
And then you show him the door.
He’ll compliment your rack, then ask you back
To his bachelor pad in the sky
But he’ll have a pout, with his sex balls out
When you say he’s not your type of guy
It’s not just his games or his roleplay aims
That’ll have you running away
Or the fact that you’ll find him at Giggles Beach
Almost every single day
It’s his lack of finesse and state of undress
Though he thinks his charms a draw
But the truth is plain, he’s not your aim
And his character you deplore.
But, here is the thing, about Mr Bling
He’s not on his own I’m afraid
Across the whole Grid there are many like him
All plying their distasteful trade
Randomly sending TPs without call
As they try to score and get laid:
But ‘mute’ is your friend, and defender will help
To keep these guys out your hair
And if that doesn’t work, you can always try wit
And bring heavy sarcasm to bear!
At the end of the day poor Mr Bling
Is simply doing his best
But his shiny medallion and dated prim cock
Simply proclaim him a pest
So next time your see him, pass on this advice
And hope that it’s going to work
Tell him to keep his prims in his pants
And try not to be such a jerk!
So shine bright tonight,
You and I
We’re beautiful like diamonds in the sky
Sia – Diamonds