Awkward conversations

“Wow… You guys are just so friendly, what a great welcome, I’m so glad to be here. I don’t think I’ve ever been to a club where everyone is so helpful and friendly. Thank you so much for your welcome!”

“Erm, hi. Were you aware you aren’t wearing any knickers? It’s just, with that short skirt, I think you’ll find that everyone in the room – and I do mean everyone – is currently camming your lady bits! Might explain why the guys are being so friendly and helpful” 😉

=ooo=

“This place is fun, although I’m not sure why you all rave about the light show; it’s not all that impressive.”

“Girl! Where the hell didya get that facelight? It’s like you have the sun plugged straight into your face! For all that is good and holy, please turn the damn thing off before we all die of radiation exposure!”

=ooo=

“Welcome to the club, remember it costs money to maintain the sim, and don’t forget to tip the DJ, dancers, and of course, your greeter!”

“Seriously? You do realise that I’ve only just this second walked through the door? At least give me a chance to enjoy myself first… And I’m hardly likely to forget about tipping any of the hangers-on here when I’m getting reminded every three seconds that I’m ‘obliged’ to!”

=ooo=

Hooooo!                 Hooooo!                 Hooooo! Hooooo!                       Hooooo! Hooooo!
Hooooo!                 Hooooo!         Hooooo!                Hooooo!          Hooooo!             Hooooo!
Hooooo!                 Hooooo!    Hooooo!                        Hooooo!    Hooooo!                   Hooooo!
Hooooo! Hooooo!Hooooo!   Hooooo!                           Hooooo! Hooooo!                      Hooooo!
Hooooo! Hooooo!Hooooo!   Hooooo!                            Hooooo!Hooooo!                      Hooooo!
Hooooo! Hooooo!Hooooo!      Hooooo!                         Hooooo! Hooooo!                    Hooooo!
Hooooo!                 Hooooo!         Hooooo!                    Hooooo!     Hooooo!                Hooooo!
Hooooo!                 Hooooo!              Hooooo!            Hooooo!             Hooooo!        Hooooo!
Hooooo!                 Hooooo!                   Hooooo! Hooooo!                        Hooooo! Hooooo!

“Get off my screen!”

“Wanna go somewhere quiet and get jiggy on some poseballs with me?”

“Frankly, I’d rather wade naked through raw sewage on my hands and knees whilst being shot at by rabid hordes of evil zombies, accompanied by an orchestra of primary school violinists playing Justin Bieber’s greatest hit for the rest of eternity. Not gonna happen sweetie.”

=ooo=

“Does my bum look big in this?”

“Yes”
(so do your tits – seriously, you think that’s attractive?)

=ooo=

“Hi. Nice place you have here.”

“Thanks, unexpected complete stranger. Erm… You seem to have made yourself very much at home, not that I’ve a problem with that, but this is actually my home and I was kinda hoping for a little privacy on my own land – hint, hint – and my word, what a lot of boxes you’ve rezzed, and I couldn’t help noticing the lovely little cottage you’ve built in my back garden… I’m sure you couldn’t possibly be thinking of leaving it there, surely?”

=ooo=

“Hey! You looking at my man, bitch? Keep your hands to yourself and your eyes off! You hear what I’m telling you?”

“Indeed I do hear what you’re telling me, but I must confess my bemusement, since I certainly was not looking at your, or anybody else’s man, and if you’re so paranoid that you have to have your ‘look at’ targets permanently switched on, in order to pounce on anyone whose gaze might accidentally flick in his general direction, then I’d suggest you’re either suffering from teeny weeny insecurity issues, or you simply can’t trust your bloke to keep his prim man bits in his pants. You hear what I’m telling you?”

=ooo=

“Why are you so short? You’re not one of those age play freaks are you?”

“Why are you so tall? You’re not one of those freaks who has absolutely no concept of realistic human body proportions are you?”

=ooo=

“You don’t do that Second Life thing, do you?”

“Err… yes!”

s. x

Who cares anymore, who’s there anymore
(I question everything)
Five Finger Death Punch – Question Everything

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