Numpty

Numpty: A person who never has or never will have a f*ing clue what he is doing. (Urban Dictionary)

I’m generally pretty clued up on most things, but occasionally I do have my moments – usually when the normal course of things isn’t running quite true to form.

It all started when I arranged to have a rather large canvas print delivered to my local DHL collection point – an office supplies firm located on a nearby industrial estate. I’ve never really got on with these kind of places, and invariably end up driving round in circles, peering through the windows at unit numbers, whilst parked lorry drivers laugh at my ineptitude. So I armed myself with my phone and Google Maps, determined to do better this time. It didn’t work… After driving round for ten minutes, I finally wandered into a hardware wholesalers, who informed me I was at the wrong industrial estate. Damn you and your lies, Google!

Once in the right place, I safely picked up my delivery, made my way home and started the tricky business of mounting my canvas… And that’s when I noticed my phone was missing. Frantic searching of the house, clothing and car proved fruitless; Google’s ‘Find my Phone’ absolutely couldn’t find it (damn you and your lies, Google!); and when I called my number, it went straight to voicemail. I feared the worst.

To cut a long story fairly short, a call to my comms provider followed, device blocked and SIM blacklisted. Then they told me my contract had finished and I could have an upgrade, with a new phone. Transferred, given the options, picked a new phone, discussed plans… It was only at that point that I spotted my phone, stacked neatly on top of the CD rack, where I’d left it when I came home with my parcel!

Embarrassed apologies all round, cancelled new phone order, transferred back to the guy I’d previously spoken to, SIM whitelisted, device unblocked, everything back to normal. Numpty!

Sometimes, I guess, that’s just the way things are and it’s not just limited to the real world… It’s something we’re all more than capable of, no matter how long we’ve been around SL. Hands up if you’ve recently found yourself publicly wearing a box, logged in to find yourself inappropriately still where you were when you logged out, or publicly said something highly embarrassing that was intended for a private IM window.

I’ve seen people send a whole room of avatars a web link to a porn site instead of an Amazon page; people saying shockingly insulting things about others, without realising that the object of their scorn is stood just outside their camera view; and, I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen someone accidentally reveal all their charms as a consequence of trying to get changed in public. As for dodgy typos, there’s a whole world of pain to be experienced for those with fat fingers and imperfect keyboard skills!

This is just a small selection of the many ways in which SL can reveal you to be a total twit, usually very publicly and with little hope of redemption. However, just like my phone failure, they are the sort of thing that can happen to us all at any time, without warning, no matter how clued up and sensible we might otherwise normally be.

That’s just the way the world, real and virtual, is!

s. x

You must be out of your brilliant mind
And they must be out of their brilliant minds
Everyone out of their brilliant minds
I’m must be out of my brilliant mind
My brilliant mind
Furniture – Brilliant Mind

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This entry was posted in Philosophicalisticality, Rants, RL, SL. Bookmark the permalink.

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